Perspective can be a tough thing to gain. When we are too close to something, our vision can become distorted and we can fail to see what needs to be seen.
Our perception of truth, clarity, and expectations can cause us to see what we want to see and not what needs to be seen. Delusion is often the fuel for many painful, self-sabotaging, and destructive behaviors that bring havoc and chaos to our own lives and those of the people we love.
While some might suggest that this is simply living on the edge, taking chances, and being risk-adverse, it is actually creating a recipe of sick, repetitive cycling that can eventually create breakdowns in relationships, families, and even professional stability. At some point, it is no longer enough that you are a super rockstar at work if your personal life resembles that of a reality soap opera equipped with its own intervention team.
When you find yourself losing support, friends, loved ones, and yes, eventually your own family members, it could be time to take some space. Creating distance, going within, to do the deep water dive work, can give you the answers that no one else can provide to you.
People in our lives can sometimes tell us something is off with us without having to say a word. Avoidance, silence, and general distance can be indicators that perhaps there is a problem…and, well it may be with us. Rather than get mad, or worse, react in a way that further destroys the trust in the connection or breaks it completely, see the distance as a gift, an opportunity to check in with yourself to reflect. Are you grumpy? Are you sad? Are you still grieving things that should have been released long ago?
If the answer is yes, then sit down, first with yourself and then with your loved ones, and let them know what you’re experiencing. Be honest. Be open. Be willing to become vulnerable enough to share, transparently, and if warranted, ask for help, support, and guidance to aid you in the process.
We all have wounds that will not completely close, but with the right kind of support, they can heal enough that over time, they can serve to help others when we share the gift of our journey and allowing others their gift of space.